Severe heartache - pouring all my feelings out

I had not seen him for more the 6 months

I think i will forget his looks soon as i'm really bad with remembering people faces

I really like him alot that i find it very difficult to forget him or put all of our past behind me

I enjoyed the time that i spent with him even if it is just a real simple dinner of carrot cake or McDonalds

I like the feeling of him worried about me going home when it's raining very heavily

I like the feeling of him sheltering me with umbrella

I like the way he try to cheer me up when i insist that he do it

I like his company to the movies even when i know he don't like to watch english movies

I like his effort to give me my birthday present before my birthday have passed

I like his fatherly look

I like to know that he filial to his parents

I like that he is good to his friends though he can be naggy at times

I like to listen to his stories of how he rejected some gals before(I think i have joined in this league)

I like it when he told me that he have the same feelings for me too

I like that he wanted to buy durians for me

I like that he suggested going for holidays on either his or my birthday(but i guess he was just joking)

I like to see his sms appearing in my inbox

I like to see his name appear on my phone

I like to have him accompanying me to see the doctor

I like having him to send me home whenever we go out

I like to hear his voice

I like to hear his laughter

I like to hear him grumble and share his unhappiness with me

I like to know i am one that he can tell me how much is his pay

I like to hear him tell me that he are fat

I like to hear him talk about his family

I like to hear him telling me what is he doing at the moment

I like to hear him saying that he just went/or is going for his game

In short, i like everything about him, there isn't anything that i don't like about him

But i guess

i must be really bad that you do not even want to start a relationship with

i must really bad that i can't share your problems with you

i must really bad that you need to avoid me

i must really bad that being friends now is also very difficult

i must be really bad that no matter what you say, i just can't forget you

I am sorry if i interrupt and disrupt your life

I am sorry if i am a nuisance to you

Though we have too much differences or our world, friends, thinking, age or whatever is very different, i can't denied the fact that i fall really hard for you.

Because of you and this incident,

i cry like crazy in the past

i try to delete all your contacts but i really can't bear to

i was so sad that my friends got worried for me

But for a relationship to work, it takes 2 hands to clap. If only the right hand is moving but the left hand is not moving, this relationship will only work

I can't move on mainly because you did not reject me directly but kept on telling me to let nature takes it course. I would really prefer you to reject me directly than bringing around in circles.

Though we no longer meet each other but i still yearn to see you, hear your voice and see your sms

But i suppose all these are just wishful thinking. i must now stand up all by myself again though i do not know how long will this takes but life must still go on

All the best to you too

Lastly, just want to say.... i really like you!!